6 months.. Can You Hear, Dad?

Hello~

This posting gonna be a serious one I guess *surely?*
sa, go!

So, yesterday was the exact 6 months my father passed away. It feels like 6 years for me!
Time passed by so slowly, huh?
so I've been wondering what my father doing now up there? In heaven.. do he watch us? do he remember us? I always asked that everyday.
Pa, are you still by my side?
I lost the only role model of my life.. I lost someone as precious as him.. I lost almost everything of my life when he's not in this world..
I miss him, I miss you dad.. The only father that I have.. why you leave me?!
I always an introvert, but you, my father, always encouraged me to have confident in front of a sea of people.. you know that I cannot speak clearly but you never mocked me, like everyone, those who always said that I'm mute!
a few days ago, my heart stabbed when I entered my brother's room. He stuck your picture, in his study desk.. we missed you dad.. so much that we can't even describe how..


The constellation of Leo is twinkling again, bestowing this earth with tears

From that day, I've had one wing on my back
The night turns to day, and the memories from the stars fade


This sky, and this song, have lost their color, lost their sound
Why aren't they real?
Your dream engulfs me, becomes a star, and continues to sound out

The starry sky twinkles again, and it honors my tears
When I ran, I released lights; This world without you in it is "an illusion"

It's your fault that my heart aches

Even now, pieces stab my heart

yes dad, I only have one wing now, because you brought the other with you to your eternal home

My day just black and white now

every moment with you stabbed my heart so much


This flower, that bird, the wind, and the moon, they stop time

Even if I close my eyes and pretend to be someone else, it's useless
You, who have turned to ashes, were quite small
I don't understand, has this world gone crazy? It's so peaceful, ahh

The starry sky twinkles again, and it honors my tears
When I ran, I released lights; This world without you in it is "an illusion"

How many have passed by? The stars flow through the sky...
And here, I strum out the feeling that you gave to me, called "eternity"

From that day, I've had one wing on my back
Even when I pretend to call people with 'dad' you are just irreplaceable

has this world gone crazy dad?

this world without you is a complete illusion

for eternity dad.... you are always be my father

even I just have one wing now



you do know this song right, dad? the song that always remind me of you
Fantasy by Alice Nine

always... remind me of you..
can you hear, dad?

SID - Nokoriga (Lingering Scent)

Kanji

一応の「またね…。」 背を向けた あなたの髪
春風をまとって 薄れていく 残り香

明日から 痛みは 日を追うごと 増していくでしょう
明日から あなたは 淡々と忘れていくでしょう

桜の舞う 季節まで待って せめて 僕から別れを
忙しいあなたのことだから 届かぬ願い
突然のさよなら、必然

子供の頃も かさぶたを 我慢できず
途中で剥がしては 怒られてた 変わらない

あれから 幾つかの 恋をした ふりをした僕に
受話器越し あなたは
穏やかにうなずいた そうじゃない

逢いたい気持ちとは 裏腹に 臆病な夜を 重ねて
時間だけが ただ過ぎていくよ 残されたまま
あの日から ひとつも 進めない

たまにくれるね 優しさの 赤い絵文字 嬉しくない
それより ずっと欲しいのは 本当の さよならさ
すごく 怖いけど 歩きだすよ

桜の舞う 季節まで待って せめて 僕から別れを
忙しいあなたのことだから 届かぬ願い
突然のさよなら、必然

さよなら ありがとう


Romaji

Ichiou no "Mata ne..."   se wo muketa   anata no kami
harukaze wo matotte usurete yuku nokoriga

ashita kara itami wa hi wo ou goto mashite yuku deshou
ashita kara anata wa tantan to wasurete yuku deshou

sakura no mau kisetsu made matte  semete boku kara wakare wo
isogashii anata no koto dakara  todokanu negai
totsuzen no sayonara, hitsuzen

kodomo no koro mo, kasabuta wo gaman dekizu
tochuu de hagashite wa okorareteta kawaranai

are kara ikutsuka no koi wo shita furi wo shita boku ni
juwaki goshi anata wa
odayaka ni unazuita  sou janai

aitai kimochi to wa urahara ni okubyou na yoru wo kasanete
jikan dake ga tada sugite yuku yo nokosareta mama
ano hi kara hitotsu mo susumenai

tama ni kureru ne yasashisa no akai emoji ureshikunai
sore yori zutto hoshii no wa hontou no sayonara sa
sugoku kowai kedo aruki dasu yo

sakura no mau kisetsu made matte  semete boku kara wakare wo
isogashii anata no koto dakara  todokanu negai
totsuzen no sayonara, hitsuzen

sayonara arigatou


Translation

A tentative "see you..." was said as your hair turned on me, disregarding my presence...
While your lingering scent clad onto the spring breeze and continued to weaken...

From tomorrow, the pain will continue to increase as the days go by...
From tomorrow, you will unconcernedly continue to forget about me...

My farewell will at least wait until the season the cherry blossoms dance!
It's because you are always so busy, that my request won't reach...
Which is why an abrupt farewell... is inevitable

Even when I was small, I couldn't stand the scabs I got
I would get angry while peeling it off... I haven't changed

Since then, several girls have acted like they've fallen in love with me.
Across the telephone receiver, you gently nod your head in assent, but I'm sure you're not actually...

My feelings of wanting to meet you is in contrast, causing the timid nights to pile up
Only time is passing us by, as I remain here...
Since then not a single thing has progressed...

The kindness which you occasionally show in your red Emojis don't make me happy
But more than that, the thing that I've always wanted was a true farewell
Even though I'm real scared, I will begin to walk!

My farewell will at least wait until the season the cherry blossoms dance!
It's because you are always so busy, that my request won't reach...
Which is why an abrupt farewell... is inevitable

Farewell... and thank you...

credits to wingom.livejournal.com

:D